1964
by kateandroger
Summary: What happens when the characters run off on their own- and away from the original script? Roger Anderson and Kate professing their love at the train station? Richard has angst and quotes "Jane Eyre" ? Lots of weird things happen. Later on in the series, the rest of the Pan Am gang join in on the fun- Dean/Colette, Laura/Ted, Maggie/people?, and of course, Kate/Roger.


"You'll shoot me in front of all these people?"

"It's fairly easy to explain..."

"Shoot me then. But tell Richard that I'm sorry for failing, and that should I have lived, we could've gotten a coffee together. Not as coworkers, but more of a date. I would have liked that."

*Roger looks hurt*

"Kate- you haven't noticed, you don't understand.."

*Roger casts a look her way, desperately.*

"Understand what, Anderson? You would shoot me in pursuit of money. Cashing in from the Soviets, aren't we _Roger_?"

"I love you Kate. I love you. I protected you, because I love you. When you wouldn't lie I got so frustrated-"

"So this is famous MI6 spycraft at work. You don't need to keep lying to me Anderson, you're about to shoot me anyway. In front of all of these people."

*Roger moves towards Kate. She backs up against the counter, but Roger doesn't move past her, just stands like a statue uncomfortably close to her.*

"Anderson?" She breathed.

*He suddenly grabs Kate's' wrist. Roger looked at her for a moment before leaning closer and threading a hand through her red hair. He crashed his lips against hers roughly.*

*Kate looks started. She was caught off guard.*

"I…I couldn't take it anymore. Kate, you must understand, Nico Lonza is on that list, and if Nico was gone, I would have a shot. With you. Or so I thought. I wouldn't actually shoot you. You don't shoot people you love. I was planning to have you just hand it over, or maybe I would just give you a sedative injection-"

"All this time Anderson, and you tell me now?" Kate asks incredulously, also dripping with sarcasm.

"I have no choice in the matter, you thought I was trying to kill you, so I had to explain myself."

"You thought I was just going to hand it over? Anderson, you must know me better. After all, you said that I was good at spying. I wouldn't just hand it over."

*Roger wipes his forehead in frustration*

"You were planning to sacrifice ALL of those people just because you THINK you love me?"

"Not think Kate. Love isn't something you just think up."

*He looks up, hoping to see some compassion in Kates' eyes. He is disappointed*

She just stared at the blue-eyed man in front of her.

He continues. "All of those times I helped you, and smiled, you never felt anything? Just dismissed it as traditional MI6 spycraft?" Anderson says sarcastically, but also very distraught.

"Earlier, Kate, I said I got frustrated. But that wasn't the end of it. After you left, I got frustrated enough that I broke a quite valuable lamp and then I wept over you. Kate Cameron, stewardess for Pan Am and courier for the CIA, you made a trained MI6 agent, an agent trained to show no emotion, or easily shift emotions, weep. You just wouldn't put the shooting behind you. If you failed the polygraph, they **would **put your head on a platter." He chocked out.

"That doesn't sound like the reserved British spy I know." She chided softly. "You sound a little different from your usual air... You never show much emotion… Not that there's anything wrong with how you usually are. I realize that that's how you are at work…"

"You bring that up now, Cameron?" He smiled, a little smile, but a first during this somber conversation. "There is something we can do in the meantime, now that you know I won't shoot you. And now that you finally realize I love you, we will take the list to CIA headquarters together. Later. "

"Tell me why you fell for me?" She smiled, handing him her hand.  
"Okay. Two things."  
She took a moment to stare at him, trying to decide what exactly he was suggesting. There was something almost playful about his smile. He couldn't mean, certainly not—  
"No! Not that. God, Kate, now I really am curious as to what you think about me."  
"I didn't mean to offend you. This is a new situation for me."

"Why don't we stop by my flat? There is something I wish to show you." [He has a flat in New York in my story, I mean he must have enough money to rent one out.. maybe he pawned some jewelry along the way. I bet he has killed some rich people in his career. *AHEM* Sorry, off topic.]

* * *

*15 minutes later*

"Kate, I have some things to clear up with my handler over the phone for a moment. Make yourself at home."

*Kate responds to him with an "Alright", and starts to snoop around.*

"Find anything interesting?" Kate almost startled at Roger's voice, but hid it relatively well.

"A number of insignificant things."

"Such as?" He pressed, sitting down on the leather couch (which looked rather refined).  
"No pictures. Nothing particularly personal at all." [Maybe he has some more personal objects in London, after all he is British, he was born there.. but he does seem to be in multiple places, considering his job. New York suits him. Because that's where Kate is.]  
Just as Roger opened his mouth to disagree Kate continued.

"Except for a few of the books. Some are more worn than others. Favorites."

"Very observant. You learn fast."

"Hardly. Women have a God-given skill for casual snooping."

"Among their many natural talents."

"Certainly one of our favorites." Kate turned to smile but instead was met with a rather intense stare. "What?"

"Nothing." He replied, closing his eyes and leaning his head back.

"Are you feeling all right?" She asked, taking a seat next to him on the couch. Just as she reached out to touch his cheek, his hand caught her by the wrist. An audible gasp escaped Kate's lips before she could stop it.

She was suddenly reminded of that night in her hotel room, after her test mission. When she asked about Bridgette and he had taken her by the wrist to pull the door closed behind him. But not before telling her that they had high hopes for her.  
"What is it?" Roger asked, breaking her train of thought.  
"Just thinking." She smiled weakly, not pulling away from him. Instead she let her fingers brush against his bare forearm. The warmth of his skin surprised her. For some reason Kate never thought of Roger as a warm body. Truth be told she never thought much of him aside from his position as her contact (and sometimes as a friend, to use the term loosely). And the odd thought that would pop into her head over those long flights.

"Anything interesting?"

"Not particularly."

"I find that hard to believe."

"Is this the… never mind."

"No, no. Go ahead."

"Is this the life a spy can expect? Nothing personal around the house, no one to come home to?"

"Don't judge based on my life, Kate. I don't have personal belongings because… well, simply put, because I don't. It wasn't a happy childhood, so I don't keep family pictures around. And I have been less than successful with the women in my life. Sometimes it's easier to come home to an empty house. But there are plenty of spies who manage a normal life. Look at Richard."

"Richard?"

"He has a family."

"Really?"

"Well, had. She died in a spying mission many years before. He and his little boy were devastated, but to get back on the subject, I must say you never struck me as the kind of woman who would make decisions based on how it might affect a future relationship."  
"I've been thinking about it a lot since Nico… the whole thing just made me feel…"

"Used?"

"Yes." Kate sighed, slipping off her shoes and curling her legs beneath her. Their hands were still entwined, now resting on the cushion between them. "Most of what I've done I can get over. I can rationalize it away. But when those men came into my apartment and took him… I thought that would be the lowest point in this job. Until last night." [Episode "1964" takes place one day after Kate shoots , right? Whatever.]

Suddenly, a thought occurred to Kate.

"Kissing me wasn't that bad." Kate stared at him blankly for a moment before she began to laugh. Roger too joined in.  
"No, it wasn't. And you know that's not what I meant…" Kate stopped for a moment and observed Roger. He looked different when he smiled. Younger almost. His face relaxed. That stern British reserve disappeared almost completely.  
That might have been what compelled Kate to act on her impulse. That must have been it. His smile. Not that she would say that if he asked why she decided to lean over and kiss him. It was just as sudden as their kiss earlier that day. But this time it lasted longer. A spike of heat went through her as she breathed in the scent of Anderson's cologne.

Roger finally let go of her hand, reaching up and pulling her closer. His fingers in her now mussed hair sent a tingling sensation down her spine. Kate felt rather bold when she slid one leg over him and settled in his lap without pulling away from their embrace. She could feel Roger inhale deeply, one hand sliding down from her hair, trailing across her throat. His fingers took to tracing the line of her neck.  
Boldness morphed into a feeling that could only be described as brazen when she felt Roger's reaction growing beneath her. Without thinking she arched towards him, suddenly putting a damper on things. Roger pulled back quickly with a pained groan. She had pressed against his bruised ribs. [From the mission in London.]

"Oh my God! I'm so sorry, Roger."

"Okay." He managed to groan, putting a protective hand over the injured area. "Should stop anyway."

"I suppose you're right." Kate agreed unenthusiastically as she eased off of his lap.

"Not for lack of interest, Kate. I just don't think it's a good idea right now. You're coming out of shock and I'm in no condition for physical activity."

He gave her a peck on the forehead, and then smiled.

"So it seems you've fallen for me, Miss Cameron?" He smirked.

"Well.." She started.

"Go on," said Anderson as he poured himself some scotch.

"That mission in London. Afterwards, you complimented me. Said I did a good job. And then remember how I suddenly decided that I didn't want to separate myself from the business just yet? Maybe that was love. Maybe in my subconscious, I didn't want to lose you. Or maybe after that test mission. When I asked about Bridgette and you had taken me by the wrist to pull the door closed behind you. But not before telling me that they had high hopes for me. Maybe that was a moment of love also. Before tonight, I thought it was just a strong feeling of companionship. There's not a lot of people who you can talk to about spying, or who even have spied before."

"Miss Cameron, you really do astound me sometimes."

She giggled, and asked, "Will I be your first picture?"

"Hmm?"

"You said you haven't been successful with the women in your life, and that's why you have no pictures. Will I be your first picture?"

"Odd thoughts do come to your mind at odd times, do they Kate?"

"Answer me Anderson, or I'll do something to you wouldn't like," she said playfully.

'"I doubt that I wouldn't like whatever you're planning Miss Cameron, but," He got up and fished a camera from his bookcase.

"Smile!"

She struck an appealing pose; after all, she was from Pan Am. And nobody can turn down Pan Am.

The photo developed in the camera and popped out.

"As you have noticed Kate, I have no picture frames, so this shall go into my wallet." He pulls out a worn dark brown wallet. Inside is a large amount of money, a fake ID (he keeps his real one hidden in the lining of his coat) which is coincidentally the Russian alias he used on Kate's test, a coded note, and a small plastic holder that has no picture. He folds the photo and slips it in. "Your pretty face will be with me everywhere."

Kate chuckled.

"What?"

"Nothing, just… I'm not usually referred to as a pretty face."

"I find that difficult to believe."

"Not that difficult, I'm sure. You've met Laura."

"There are dozens of girls who look like Laura. Yours is a unique beauty."

Kate, hiding her blush, suddenly had a question come to mind. "Why or how did you fall for me Anderson, that was thing #2, wasn't it? You still haven't shown me what you said you would either," she chided.

Roger pulled a small golden box out of his coat pocket and handed it to Kate. "Thing #1, as requested."

"Anderson, you shouldn't have!"

"I wonder what this could be?" she wondered aloud, rattling the box.

He pulled on the ribbon and it fell to the floor.

"Open it," he insisted, smiling, with a hint of mischievousness.

Kate slowly pulled off the top of the box, and gasped.

".. you- you – didn't!" she stuttered. "Anderson, you kept this?"

"For you. After all, it's already fitted and it didn't cost me a dime."

Kate whacked him playfully, although he did dodge (because he's a trained spy :D) the blow, and put on the bracelet.

"When I picked this out that night, it was because I actually wanted it. I knew I wouldn't actually be able to keep it, but a girl can dream in the meantime. And a Pan Am salary wouldn't even cover half of the price of that bracelet."

"I suspected as much, after all, I remember you saying the CIA didn't give you any pennies..?"

"So you remember."

Kate squealed with joy. She just couldn't believe that she had gotten a diamond bracelet, one she knew she could never afford. It was just one of those girly things.

[The one with the diamond chips from that one episode..]

Anderson smiled as Kate started clapping with excessive joy, like a child.

And just like that, she kissed him again. But this time, it wasn't for the sake of a mission.

Flustered, Roger said, "Um well yes, um, you're very welcome Kate… Would you like a drink?"

Satisfied, Kate replied, "Yes, I'll have some lemonade."

As Roger stumbled to his kitchen, you could hear Kate calling out, "Thank you Anderson!" playfully.

He handed Kate a glass of lemonade.

Just then, the grandfather clock in the corner of the room called out 12 o' clock.

Roger stood up, offered his hand to Kate, and said, "Shall we take the microphone to CIA headquarters?"

Kate sat her drink on a coaster on the coffee table in front of her, and took his hand. "Yes, I believe we shall."

* * *

*15 minutes later*

Kate and Roger entered the subway together, holding hands and talking about trivial matters. Such as their birthdays, favorite destinations, and favorite deserts.

"I never saw you as the type of man who liked strawberry tarts!" Kate muffled a laugh.

"You like Rome? How.. predictable." He said, turning to look at her, smiling.

Kate gave him a stern look, but smiled when she brought her eyes to his face.

"KATE!" Richard suddenly burst in out of nowhere, though I suspect he was pacing around looking for her, because he had a strained look.

"Double crossing MI6 garbage!" yelled Richard as he slugged Anderson in the nose.

Blood streamed out, but Anderson stemmed the flow quickly. [Ah, the charm of Kate Cameron. She attracts love from her handlers and contacts. *headdesk*]

"Richard!" Kate shrieked , rushing towards him. Richard mistook it from relief instead of anger, and he opened his arms for a hug, but instead he got slapped in the face.

"Not like that hasn't ever happened to me," he said while rubbing his face where she hit him, "but considering the situation, why did you slap me Kate?" He said puzzled.

"What is your problem?!" Kate yelled, fuming.

"Why did you hit Anderson?!" She cried out, still panicking in the slightest. She rushed towards Anderson and asked if he was okay.

"I.. was saving you? Because… he shot me and kidnapped you?"

"He didn't kidnap me! I went willingly," she huffed. Suddenly, something registered in Kate's eyes, so she spun around and demanded that Anderson explain to her why he shot Richard.

He clenched his teeth. "I had to take that microphone from him, and he put up quite a fight. I didn't shoot to kill though."

"Am I missing something Kate? Since when were you and Anderson so cozy?"

Anderson popped in the conversation and answered for Kate. "Since she realized she loved me."

"Richard, I know what you said about not getting into relationships with other spies, but-"

"So you love Anderson, huh?" he said, unusually cold.

Kate stared blankly at him.

"Dammit Anderson, you stole my girl!" Richard looked ready to explode.

"Excuse me, YOUR girl? Since when have you- what?!" was the response he got from Kate. Anderson had a similar response, but I'm omitting it because of the large amounts of curse words, including some in foreign languages (mainly Russian).

Richard went up to Kate and kissed her too, only to be shoved away by Kate, and punched in the nose (haha Karma! No wait.. Anderson shot him, so BAD KARMA, BAD. YOU DID NOT DO YOUR JOB) by Anderson.

"Anderson! [Yelling at him because he punched Richard]Richard! [Yelling at him because he kissed her] Okay, okay," Kate grabbed at her hair. "This is too much information to take right now… My MI6 contact loves me, but I think I love him too.. But my CIA handler loves me and I don't.. Why me?" Kate looked stressed.

"Richard, Anderson and I will be taking the microphone up to CIA headquarters. Okay?" she said when she finally calmed down (and stopped hyperventilating).

"I don't trust him. Kate, he's an expert at seducing women, just as you seduce men!"

"I still have the microphone, and Anderson had a few hours to snatch it from me. For example, when I was at his loft-" [She didn't want to think about how Anderson might just be seducing her right now.]

"I see how it is now. You and Anderson, wonderful couple. You've already seen his loft, spent time with him, and apparently you love him?"

"Kate, let's go." Roger took her hand, and she, still distraught, unconsciously squeezed it. Richard was seen ramming his head on a wall, as Kate clung to Anderson all the way to CIA headquarters.

"Oh, Jane [Kate]! my hope-my love-my life! broke in anguish from his lips. Then came a deep, strong sob."

[Maybe this whole Richard thing was just plain messy, but I felt like it.]

As Kate and Anderson made their way to CIA headquarters, they got weird looks, because A: Kate was clinging to Anderson, B: Anderson was MI6 and Kate was a courier so what the hell is this fuckery?, and C: Because word might've gotten around about the whole Richard incident. Just sayin'.

Kate quickly relayed to Anderson what Richard had told her that morning. "Umm.. We're supposed to meet an Allen O'Neil on the 14th floor, last office to the left. The password is 'albatross'."

They got into the elevator, and as scared as she was, Kate managed to stay together. She didn't stop, and she arrived to the last office to the left. She knocked on the door, once, and a man in his 40s emerged. Her voice trembled as she said, "Albatross."

The man's face relaxed, knowing now that she was sent by Richard. He held his hand out, and Kate opened up her coat lining and handed it to him.

He nodded, and smiled as to say "Good Job."

She nodded back, fearing that by speaking, the mission would be jeopardized. The man disappeared into his office, and sensing that Kate was a bit overwhelmed, he whispered in her ear: "Anyone could be a double agent here. You never know who is listening. Most drops are silent to ensure each person's safety."

Calmed down, she managed a trembling smile, and clung to him again.

They made their way back to the first floor, and exited the CIA headquarters.

Roger sensed that Kate was still clinging to him, so he asked her if she wanted to go back to his flat to regain her nerves.

She quickly nodded.

[Throughout the story, I'll add what other characters have done with their life just to add to the consistency of the story.]

Later, Richard was admitted back to the hospital because he wasn't fully recovered, and the whole "hitting your head on a wall thing" didn't help to convince the doctors that he was okay either.

[I've also been reading Jane Eyre, so please excuse me if I plagiarize some quotes and stuff- modifying the names and such, but still plagiarism. Wait, never mind, I'll add quotation marks..]

"He [Richard] would feel himself forsaken; his love rejected: he would suffer; perhaps grow desperate."

"Am I cruel in my love? He said [thought Richard]." He laid his head down, and closed his eyes, sorrowful.

* * *

*15 minutes later*

They arrived at Anderson's flat, now being 3 o' clock. Kate had no Pan Am duties tonight or Anderson any MI6 missions. They sat in silence for a moment, until Kate asked Anderson if such a love triangle ever existed between spies- to his knowledge. He opened his mouth to speak, but closed it again. Finally, he seemed satisfied enough with his words, so he spoke aloud.

"You indeed have a unique beauty, Miss Cameron, and a striking personality."

Kate was silent, inferring that his answer meant that this was an unusual circumstance.

Anderson broke the silence. "Kate.. Do you, are you, you're sure that you love me?" he asked, not looking into her eyes.

She took a deep shuddering breath, closed her eyes, and reopened them. She knew her answer.

"Anderson, my heart leapt whenever I breathed in your cologne. I smiled whenever I saw you, as surprised I may be. I gasp whenever you brush your fingers over my wrist. I'm left breathless whenever I kiss you. I daresay I am in love with the one and only, my one and only Roger Anderson."

Anderson believed her, 100%. His brain told him this was dangerous, being close to her, but his heart had overridden everything. He was in love with Katherine Cameron.

He finally looked up to her eyes.

* * *

*A few hours later*

She felt guilty, and so she went to visit Richard. She sat with him until he woke up.

She returned back to Anderson's loft and sat with him, again in a mutual silence. She got up, and skimmed through the titles of the books. She picked up a newer looking book, but it was worn nonetheless, and read the title. _Dearly Beloved by Anne Morrow Lindbergh. _ Anderson noticed her book selection, and he simply said, "I had always wanted to know what marriage felt like, if I should ever meet someone that I'd marry." She watched as he pulled out another book, titled: _The Brothers Karamazov._ But it was in Russian. No translation. Original Russian version. He sat down and began reading.

He then looked up at her. She was staring at him, amused, seeing as he actually lived a rather normal life (and that he's reading a completely Russian book, I mean if you learn a language you just don't read books in that language unless you have to). The next few hours proceeded uneventfully, but as dinnertime came, Roger went into the kitchen to fix up dinner.

"A man who fixes up dinner? Am I dreaming? Do my eyes deceive me?" Kate yelled jokingly.

"Being alone is our natural state.. bachelors cook their own meals," he said indignantly.

"They go out for drinks and hit on women."

Kate smiled at him, smug amusement written all over her face and he half smiled, half grimaced back at her.

When Roger announced that dinner was served half an hour later, Kate appeared in the kitchen, finding herself a seat. She ended up sitting across from him. The dinner was a simple salad and some pasta.

They sat together, talking about their mission in London. She felt a bit uncomfortable when talking about it, but even more so if the topic of 's death was brought up. But they weren't talking about that yet, just how they acted as a grinning redheaded stewardess and her indulgent lover.

"You did an excellent job back there, Kate, but you overdid it a bit, don't you think?"

Kate's eyes were wide and falsely innocent as she looked up at him.

"Roger, I don't know what you mean. I got him to agree to meet us that night, wasn't that the point?"

He could see in her eyes that she was daring him to bring up the kiss, challenging him because she was fully aware that he knew what she was doing. Fine then, he thought, challenge accepted.

"Yes, but throwing yourself at me like that really wasn't." Somehow her lips managed to pout and smile at the same time, an expression she gave him often, now that he thought about it.

"Why, Roger, it was all part of the game. I was just doing what any mistress would if her man bought her something as nice as that bracelet."

"And what would you know about being someone's mistress?" he shot back, before he could think, in an attempt to wipe the smug look off her face.

Kate laughed before turning her face away. She glanced back at him, the triumphant grin replaced by something else that made his stomach twist with guilt when she said, "Why don't you ask Niko?"

He recalled a similar look on her face when he had reminded her exactly what she had risked by bringing that German courier to the embassy. It was disdain and disappointment and fury and sadness all rolled together. All he could think about was that bloody kiss. And how given the chance, he realized, he would have kissed her back. What man wouldn't, with those eyes staring back at him?

Kate recovered. She put on a smile.

"You thought about that kiss! And you would've kissed me back?" Kate looked triumphant.

For God's sake, how many times had he slept with some woman in order to obtain state secrets some idiotic diplomat had allowed her to overhear? And here was Kate, barely beyond courier status, wrapping him around her finger like a seasoned pro…but a pro at what, his mind could barely decide without threatening to be overwhelmed. Roger knew Kate had slept with Niko – frequently, before his departure two months ago, according to Richard, who thought his English colleague should know this information for some reason. He chewed on his pasta, trying not to think of Kate in various states of undress. He barely knew her, she was dangerously reckless and too stubborn and sure of herself, but maybe it was that surety that attracted him – so naïve and yet revealing of an inner strength fueled by her convictions. And he couldn't drag his thoughts away from that kiss. A kiss that did, as she had argued in the park, fit the role she had been playing, but one which was far from necessary to convince even the suspicious jeweler. Her eyes had been an invitation – the phrase "bedroom eyes" came to mind – but he was tormented by the question: had she simply been playing? Or was the invitation independent of her role?

His face must've revealed all, because Kate gently reminded him, "I'm here now; just us two hapless lovers from the CIA and the MI6." Her voice softened, attempting to reassure the fears he had briefly voiced.

He smiled. She seemed to know what he was thinking just by reading his expression. A dangerous skill. Luckily, she hadn't picked up that he was thinking of her in various states of undress- though he was trying not to.

"The upcoming weeks of desk duty would be welcome for me," he said, referring to the fact he was still slightly bruised.

"What do you do exactly during desk duty, Anderson?"

"Tell other agents their assignments, take care of anything gone wrong.."

"Ah."

When they finished eating, Kate offered to wash the dishes, and despite his protests, she did so anyway. She rolled up her dress sleeves, and found a bottle of soap and a sponge underneath the sink, in the cabinetry. Whilst washing the dishes, Kate noticed an EA engraved on the bottom of the dishes.

"Anderson, what does EA stand for?" she called out to him.

"Oh. They were my mother's dishes. Her name was Evie Anderson."

"Was?"

"She passed away due to illness. Our father had already died years before, when I was a child. She was so young, she hadn't even written a will. We decided to split things up depending on who liked it, and their age. Eldest got first choice. I was the second oldest, yet I only managed to keep a few books, a pin of hers, and a few dishes."

"Oh Anderson, I'm so sorry!"

"Like I previously said, it wasn't a happy childhood. But I still feel a small bond towards her. She once told me to follow my heart, and I have always kept that memory in my mind."

* * *

*Fast forward to 11:30PM*

Kate was resting her head on Anderson's shoulders as he sipped some scotch.

"Don't you have some New Year's party to run off to?"

"I do, but I'd rather stay with you."

He closed his eyes and smiled. "Go. If we're as in love as we think we are, we'll be celebrating New Year's together in 1964."

She kissed him, and left. When she got to the street, she hailed a taxi and gave the name of Ted's apartment. When she got there, she was playfully shoved by everyone to the balcony, as they started the countdown. "Glad you could make it Kate," hugged Laura. The ball started dropping. "10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, HAPPY NEW YEAR!"


End file.
